Supreme Court Mad Libs

The United States learned a crucial lesson about George W. Bush today: if he ever asks you to lead a selection committee, there’s a good chance you’re going to be the one getting selected. It worked for Dick Cheney and the office of the Vice President, and now it seems to have done the trick for Harriet Miers and the Supreme Court.

If Ms. Miers turns out to be half the leader Mr. Cheney has proven himself to be, this country will be in great shape. But the reality is that as of today, very little is known. She has never sat on the bench before, doesn’t have a lengthy appellate argumentative record and isn’t even an elected official. Rather, Ms. Miers is the former head honcho of the Texas Bar Association, a onetime leader of the southern state’s largest law firm and a longtime friend of Mr. Bush.

Now we all know that Mr. Bush can get into trouble from time to time when he goes out of his way to put friends in power (*cough* Michael Brown *cough*). But Ms. Miers may well be the real deal. She is, by all accounts, a fervent intellectual, solid conservative and decent human being.

Still, some thoughts heading into the hearings: Ms. Miers has played a role on a lottery board in the past. Will gambling become an issue for the right? The nominee is single and nearly 60-years-old; are rainbow accusations going to be thrown about? Ms. Miers was supposedly recommended by Harry Reid. Will he vote for this nominee and, if so, does he carry his party with him?

Finally, if the process begins to stall out, look for some pressure from Ms. Miers’ supporters. It will be easy to pitch a pity play toward Sandra Day O’Conner: “The honorable justice has asked to retire so that she may spend more time with her dying husband. But the evil ___ simply will not allow this process to go forward, stalling it out for ___ days now. How low will ___ sink? How low will the ___ Party go? Call your Senator and tell them to vote for Harriet Miers.”