The New York Times does porn

Even the New York Times, a paper that certainly bends left by most intelligent accounts, had trouble taking this one seriously.

The paper dispatched reporter Matt Richtel to Las Vegas Sunday to cover the AVN awards, one of many shows in the annual run up to the Oscars. But this particular ceremony, unlike the Golden Globes and Screen Actors Guild kudos, has a certain mark of distinction: the awards are all given out for the year that was in the porn industry.

And Mr. Richtel, to his credit, sure tried to write a quasi-serious story. Thankfully, this makes for some hilarious turns, my favorite being:

The more conventional [awards] were for best director, supporting actor and actress, screenplay and the most anticipated award of the evening: best feature.

That went to "Pirates," a relatively high-budget story of a group of ragtag sailors who go searching for a crew of evil pirates who have a plan for world domination. Also, many of the characters in the movie have sex with one another.

The article even has a correction appended at the end, which apparently will run in tomorrow's paper:

An article yesterday about the awards ceremony for the sex-films industry included erroneous information from AVN Publications, the program organizer, on the name of one award-winning film by Vivid Entertainment. It is "The New Devil in Miss Jones," not "The Devil in Miss Jones."

And I know we're all glad they cleared that one up.

Despite my conservative bend, I've never actually had much of a problem with the porn industry. When I worked as a film critic, I did a couple of features on mainstream documentaries about the business and found myself on the phone with one of the business' most recognizable stars, Stacy Valentine, at one point. It sure was an experience. (And it still manifests itself from time to time – this past summer I interviewed a former prostitute and a current legal pimp; you can read the result of that one in the Badger Herald later this month.)

Still, muted as my reactions may be, it still is pretty darn amusing to see the Gray Lady trying to make sense of the industry's annual awards. The article really is worth a read, and just to tantalize, I'll leave you with this excerpt:

"The bikini models hate the topless dancers, the topless dancers hate the nude dancers, the nude dancers hate the adult-film actors," said Stormy Daniels, 26, who won an award for best supporting actress. Ms. Daniels, who said she wished people would stop judging one another, does have her own pet peeve: tired plots.

"There's nothing worse then when the pizza boy rings the doorbell, the girl says she doesn't have a tip, and then they get it on," she said. Ms. Daniels also won an award for best screenplay for a parody, "Camp Cuddly Pines Power Tool Massacre," which presumably had a storyline more in keeping with her tastes.